Someone doesn't know how to render smoke

I've been seeing these advertisements throughout the city for a new horror flick called "The Haunting in Connecticut". I can't think of anything scarier than Connecticut. The first time I saw these posters, I couldn't really make out WTF I was looking at. But upon closer inspection though, I thought someone had vandalized the posters with some brown love.


Looks like a Zune ad.


Upon even closer inspection, the only thing that crossed my mind was: "ew"


What Haley Joel Osment is reduced to acting in these days.


What is apparent about this poster is that someone doesn't know how to properly render smoke. The volumetric and specular effects are so full of fail. The smoke or ghostly ectoplasm I'm familiar with usually has a thin, wispy, ethereal quality to it. But this particular smoke has a lot of girth, is brown, reminiscent of large intestines, and appears to to have a somewhat metallic, shiny, chocolate chrome effect. Chrome + Chocolate = Scary. Maybe it's the smoke of Montezuma's ghost.


Two girls, one cup, and one boy with ipecac.


To be fair, perhaps it's not supposed to be some ectoplasmic goo from beyond at all, but the aftermath of some bratwurst fest in Hamburg gone horribly awry. In which case, the poster graphic is perfect!

Retro hand illustrations are "in"... but why?

One design trend I've been seeing a lot of lately is the retro look of hand drawn illustrations that appear as though they were drawn with markers and tempra paints, like some sort of 70's inspired art from 1982. A recent cover of Computer Arts magazine (issue #158) is a "perfect illustration" of poor execution.


This cover made my eyes bleed.


Do I like it? Eh, not really. What's wrong with it? It seems simplistic yet messy, and appears to lack any artistic skills. There is no symmetry, no balance, no depth, and no control over the contours, form, or lines. It's simply a two dimensional barf of colors and shapes.


Prince Charles as a high school art student.


This particular Computer Arts cover is particularly atrocious because of the fey douchebag on the cover. He's right out of your high school art class and the symbol of pastey, anemic folk art, complete with Zoolander's Blue Steel sunken cheeks. Note the hand-silkscreened T-shirt with stretched out neck and 70s jogging jacket. Also, the placement of the "Get your dream job" right in his crotch, well, maybe there was a typo when typing "Get your cream job".


The money shot.


Although I appreciate this new wave of neo-psychedelia, there is just too many examples of poor execution. But what of a good example? Here's one:



Delicious with a cherry on top.


The reason I liked this execution is because it puts a very contemporary spin on classic psychedelia. It's from the "new retro" tutorial on the Computer Arts website. Note the galaxy background with purples and blues, reminiscent of OS X. The rainbow also has a nice glassy effect with some fairly complex gradients, not an easy skill to master for an amateur.